About Bridesmaid
Duties
If you enjoy going through a stack of bridal magazines and catalogs for wedding invitations and favors, you will likely savor the experience of being a bridesmaid. The new dress you get to wear on the day of the event is just a bonus if your friends are a priority and you would love to help one out in the event of her marriage. Planning the bridal shower and the bachelorette party are only two tasks to check off a potentially long list, so come energized and positive for the months and weeks ahead.
Function
As a bridesmaid, your purpose is to help the bride with any wedding-related tasks she needs assistance with. These include, but are not limited to, shopping for the bridal gown, sending out the invitations, setting up appointments for the bride and groom, and reminding attendees of the dates for fittings and rehearsals. You will not necessarily fulfill the bulk of these tasks, especially since a wedding that requires so much work is likely to have more than one bridesmaid to share the load.
Types
The Maid of Honor is the chief bridesmaid. Typically, she has a close emotional bond with the bride, at least as compared to the other bridesmaids. If she is married, she is called "Matron of Honor." As the Maid of Honor, expect to be entrusted with some of the weightiest tasks, such as accompanying the bride to scout for event locations. There may be cases where the groom is not available, leaving you in the position to take his place in case the bride could use, or would even simply appreciate, your presence. If she has to drive an especially long way, for instance, to finalize bookings for the ceremony and reception, your company might ease her load. You could even offer to drive on the way back so she can at least relax a little bit.
The Junior Bridesmaid, on the other hand, is not typically required to perform any tasks. Usually, there is a Junior Bridesmaid in the wedding party because the bride and groom want her to be a notable part of their special day even if she is not of marrying age as is the old custom for bridesmaids (see Resources).
Considerations
Be very clear with the bride when it comes to the expenses you will incur due to the wedding. Ask her which ones you are expected to shoulder, and do not be embarrassed that you are inquiring. Weddings can be costly--if you will be doing a lot of running around for the bride, your gas consumption on top of the price of your hair, makeup, dress and shoes for the big day all add up. Some brides at least pay for your dress, while others even foot the bill for professional services from a hairstylist and makeup artist. Avoid surprises by having a straightforward discussion on the matter early on.
Warning
The notorious "bridezilla" experience, where the bride directs her displeasure and disappointment towards you, can be prevented. This unpleasantness is more likely if you do not do what you promised you would, since many brides feel pressured to have what can be considered the perfect wedding. Don't feel bad if you can't fulfill all the tasks the bride requests of you. After all, you have a life to live with other affairs to tend to. Ask her to go over a list of expectations she has of you shortly after you accept her invitation to be a bridesmaid. Inform her right away if there is anything that you don't think you will be able to do, but be gracious enough to offer your assistance on another matter if no one else is already handling it. If you aren't the Maid of Honor and there are several other appointed bridesmaids, you can rest assured that the other girls are there to do their share of duties, as well as split up others that anyone happens to be unable to do.
Features
It has become acceptable for the bride to have male bridesmaids contrary to tradition. If you are a man who finds yourself in a role that has normally been reserved for females, you are apparently open-minded enough. However, you should be ready for certain chores other males might not find exciting, such as accompanying the bride to wedding gown fittings. You will also likely be spending a relatively large amount of time with the other bridesmaids. Save your friendship with the bride by declining her offer if you do not think you can handle what being a bridesmaid calls for.
Tags: Maid Honor, with bride, About Bridesmaid, About Bridesmaid Duties, accompanying bride, being bridesmaid, bride groom
